New Years

Lots of fun last night. My sister and I went to John Barleycorn with lots of people. I got drunk, danced a little (but not so much that Christy had to remove me from the dance floor like last time), ate pretty good buffet food, and didn't cry. Also didn't get a migraine--another big accomplishment. After they closed, Mike and I ended up separated from the group, hanging out at McDonalds for seriously 3 1/2 hours, much of it spent waiting in line. (I'm not sure how we were in line so long--maybe we were so drunk we thought we were in line when we really weren't.) But first, on the way there, we met two young military guys. We ended up talking to them for at least two hours. It was really interesting to talk to them and hear from the horse's mouth how they felt and what they saw in Iraq and Afghanistan. They were (obviously) very much in support of what the US military is doing. The one guy, Dustin, who was the more military of the two (as exhibited by his bomber jacket with military paraphrenalia on it) was a sargeant or something. He told me one of his friends got shot and killed right next to him. But they were running for cover and he couldn't stop to help him. And yes, he had shot at people. Ug, it was so sad. Both of them just kept saying over and over how they did it for us, for the average, slovenly drunk and spoiled American (okay, those are my words) because we were worth protecting and our way of life was worth preserving. Very much in our service. And Dustin kept calling me ma'am. "Yes, ma'am. No, ma'am." It was weird because he was like my age, and he's certainly done more with his life (good or bad, that's another judgment) than I have. They must have a hard time, because they obviously are very proud of what they've done (again, whether they've used their own measure of ethics or stood by their superiors' notwithstanding), but they must feel, here, like they can't express that pride. I would find that very stifling and frustrating. And it wouldn't incline me to fight for us Americans anymore. But they seem not to care whether we're grateful or not--they just do what they are told and what they believe or are led to believe is right. Despite the fact I don't entirely agree with what they are being told to do (but then I don't know the whole story--who does), I was humbled by their unwavering dedication and willingness to give their lives to make things better for Americans and the world in general. I think for them, that pride fills in any rough edges or doubts they may have about particular actions they're not so proud of.

After they left, we got in line at McDonald's. We met some cool Lithuanian people. I talked to this one girl who said that in school there, they start learning English in 2nd grade, and then they have to learn another language after that--either Russian, German, or French. Or maybe they had to learn Russian, too. I don't remember. But she was cool. There were 5 or 6 Lithuanians there, one videotaping on his digital camera. Wonder if back home he'll show his Lithuanian family the video of drunk Americans from the inside of a McDonald's.

Then we met another guy who was getting his PhD so he could be a professor. Just about our age, again. All these people were about our age and it definitely made me feel like I'm behind the game. We ended up sitting with the professor guy, Haiken (his first name, weird, I know) and eating for another hour and a half. Very much fun. We were there so long they switched over to the breakfast menu. Yes! I never get there early enough for those greasy, cripsy little hash brown patties-- but if you stay late enough at a 24 hour McDonald's. . . .

After that we took a cab back and met up with Laura, Christy and John. Slept, woke up, drove home with a headache. At about 8 pm tonight, when both Laura and I woke up for the last time, she told me she had lots of fun. So did I. . . too bad it took me all day today to recover. Thank goodness I have the day off work tomorrow, so I can actually do something.

Also, I got more Buffy episodes from John, so I watched 3 more episodes today (my idea of a perfect day: sleeping, watching Buffy, eating cookies). Tonight I actually said the word "spiderwebby" instead of "complicated," and I know it's directly related to the insane amounts of time I'm spending watching Buffy.

Oh! New information on the people on the train thing. I think it's more a factor of the time of day. The only times I'd been on the el before were at night, when people were going out with frends, so they'd obviously talk within their groups on the train. I was on the el the other day on a weekday morning, and it was just like the Metra--nobody talked.

One more thought--I'm reading Dune, a semi-Star Wars reminiscent blend of science fiction, politics, mysticism, and human nature. (Ooh, so concise of me. I should write blurbs for book jackets.) Anyway, in it there are these Jedi-type people who are trained to have superawareness. They can identify shifts in posture, voice inflection, conversational cues, etc. to find out what's really going in in any situation--whether someone is lying, what undercurrents, feuds, or power struggles lie beneath the surface. Without having to ask (and possibly be lied to), they can get at the truth of that moment for each person. And once they know where everyone is coming from, they can splice together those different takes on the situation in order to create a more complete picture, a more unified reality. I would love to be able to do that. I hate depending on other people to tell me what the truth is, because they never tell me the whole story. I wish I could just find out for myself.